Wednesday, October 27, 2004

I Love You Forever?

I was at someone else's blog recently and on her tagboard, her boyfriend left lots of tags. There was the usual "I love you" tags, but there was one that said something like, "I love you forever" and another saying he was going to marry her.

I don't believe in saying things like "I love you forever and ever and ever" or saying that you'll marry someone when you haven't even proposed yet, so I left a tag saying that he shouldn't say those things he didn't know the future. Now the dude got pissed and said that he already had determined his future to marry her. I just replied and said that if he knew the future, good for him, but I didn't believe in making empty promises.

(By the way, about this couple, the girl is in her mid-teens and they're only celebrating their 1st month anniversary. You can see why I thought the guy was getting ahead of himself.)

Sometimes I wonder if people really know what they mean when they say, "I love you forever". That statement is literally a commitment because of the word forever. Forever is a very big word. It means eternally, which is well... a very very very very long time.

Guy: "I love you forever."
Gal: "How do you know that for sure?"

How will you answer that? Do you know for sure that you'll love her forever? Words must be backed up by actions. Are you certain that 5 years from now, you'll still be together? Forever is way longer than 5 years. If you're not sure and you can't back it up, then you're making an empty promise.

One might feel for certain that you both will be together forever and that's why you may say that statement, but everyone knows that when you're in love, your judgment is clouded by emotion. The heart can't think, it can only feel.

I remember making a stupid promise to a girl that I'd wait one year for her. And that in one year, I'd go after her again. Well, after a year, the feeling died and I realised how stupid I was, making an empty promise. But looking back to the time I made the promise, I had felt so sure that I would be able to keep that promise.

I feel that saying "I love you forever" should only be said when you're getting married. Why?

Guy: "I love you forever."
Gal: "How do you know that for sure?"
Guy: "To prove it, I'm willing spend the rest of my life with only you, no matter what happens."

When you get married, you are able to back up that statement with an action. It means you love your partner to the point that you'll give him/her the rest of your life. Marriage is THE ULTIMATE commitment. When you get married, you are actually saying that you love this person so much that you are willing commit the rest of your life with him/her no matter what happens. Like the wedding vow goes:

"... to have and to hold, from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness or in health, to love and to cherish 'till death do us part."

That commitment is no small commitment at all. It's for the rest of your freakin life! It isn't for 5, 10 or even 20 years. It's a commitment until the day you breathe your last breath.

So if you want to say, "I love you forever", I can't see any another way to back those words up other than to back it up with your life.


Blogger calm one said...

In his Devil's Dictionary, Ambrose Bierce defined love as "Love: A temporary insanity curable by marriage."
That's my fav love quote =)

Anyway, thanx for your comment on my blog =)

Concerning your question regarding my first post, ;et me explain it since u asked.

EN = in
ARCH (arche) = beginning
HN (en) = was
hO = the
LOGOS = word

it's a quote from the Bible. "In the beginning was the Word."

10:56 AM  
Blogger Zen|th said...

Ah. I see. That's from the Book Of John right? =)

2:57 PM  
Blogger Bubblemunche said...

Ha! The boyfriend guy made me cringe :P... but then again, he's just a kid, so....

Calm: Finally! Mystery solved ;)

3:16 PM  
Blogger calm one said...

The very first phrase in the Gospel of John.
I couldn't think of a good way to start my blog, so I figured I'd quote from the best-selling book of all time. And it seems to fit quite nicely =)

4:05 PM  
Blogger Hamstery said...

I agree with your view. =)

hahaha.. for me, I even have to think twice before saying I love you to others. Love and hate are such strong words isn't it?

1:05 AM  
Blogger Zen|th said...

Bubble: I'm not too sure and I may be wrong, but I think the guy is 22 years old. I thought he'd have more sense that that.

Calm: The bible is always a good book to quote from. =)

Ham: Yeah, Love and Hate are such strong words that you have to think carefully before you use it. After all, you can never take back whatever comes out of your mouth.

3:04 AM  

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